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  #1   IP: 82.17.49.126
Old 30-03-2012, 10:32 PM
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Taurus66 Taurus66 is offline
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Default Funny..

In the sleepy village of Erbum near a town of Tillit in Hertfordshire, lives a woman called Linda Lykes. She is the land-lady of the local pub, The Cockwell Inn. For some unknown reason, she gets embarrassed whenever she receives her post:

Linda Lykes
The Cockwell Inn
Erbum
Tillit
Herts
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  #2   IP: 82.17.49.126
Old 30-03-2012, 11:18 PM
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Taurus66 Taurus66 is offline
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Default Re: Funny..

A little boy comes down to breakfast. Since they live on a farm, his mother asks if he had done his chores.

"Not yet," said the little boy.
His mother tells him no breakfast until he does his chores.

...Well, he's a little pissed off, so:

he goes to feed the chickens, and he kicks a chicken.

He goes to feed the cows, and he kicks a cow.

He goes to feed the pigs, and he kicks a pig.

He goes back in for breakfast

His mother gives him a bowl of dry cereal.

"How come I don't get any eggs and bacon?
Why don't I have any milk in my cereal?" he asks.

"Well," his mother says,

"I saw you kick a chicken, so you don't get any eggs for a week.
I saw you kick the pig, so you don't get any bacon for
a week either.

I saw you kick the cow so for a week you aren't getting
any milk."

Just then, his father comes down for breakfast and kicks the cat halfway across the kitchen.

The little boy looks up at his mother with a smile, and says, "You gonna tell him or should I?"
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  #3   IP: 98.240.148.47
Old 04-04-2012, 02:58 AM
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Default Re: Funny..

^^^I about spit my coffee out across the table with that. Both are good ones.
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  #4   IP: 67.142.171.26
Old 09-05-2012, 03:51 AM
Taylor Lambert Taylor Lambert is offline
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Default Re: Funny..

This little boy on the farm asked his father to help put the chain back on his bicycle. The father said frustrated Its harvest time and noone rides anything till the combine gets fixed. The little boy comes back and asked dad if he could help work on his red wagon. The dad then again slides out from under the combine and says I just said no one rides anything till the combine gets fixed. About that time the old farm rooster mounts and hen.

The little boy football kicks the rooster off across the yard and says to the rooster didnt you hear nobody is riding nothin till the combine is fixed.


One day little Johnny's neighbor was washing dishes and saw little Johnny out the window sitting on the steps.

She saw him eat a jelly bean, bite the cats tail and move down a step.

She continued to watch him and he did it again (eat a jelly bean, bite the cat's tail and move down a step).

When curiosity got the best of her, she went across the street and asked little Johnny what he was doing.

He said "I'm playing truck driver".

She asked him "Well Johnny what does that mean?"

He said "I'm popping pills, eating pussy and moving on!"
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